Saturday, April 25, 2015

MY Love Story !.

I don’t know how to start this story…as of now I didn’t face such a dilemma to portrait anything….if you ask me, how I am related to this love story, I am unanswerable….is this my story…no !! ….then? but yet I am writing this Love story…this story consist of many feelings in love…fear of love, pain in love, satisfaction in love.. and many more….. !!!
Iam inviting you to the college life of Maya. Maya was an innocent girl, she was very sensitive too…anything can make her cry and the same way small things can make her smile also….College life was totally different from school life….school life was so materialistic that students were evaluated on the marks they get…but college life was really a new world for Maya….she found the essence of poems from there….
In an election campaign time….she saw him for the first time, he ask her to vote for his party…..she didn’t feel anything special in him…Love at first sight cannot be occur for everyone right  ;)  !!! ?
In the Magazine Committee for that year, Maya was also a member…. Magazine Editor was the same Person… Amal…..the way he edits the articles of others…every stone consists of an idiol …..he was expert in editing to make everything more beautiful….. love towards poems ,Maya got attracted with him….an Infatuation every girls may get at some point of their life….they became good friends…later they came to know that they are family friends….

One Sunday Maya was in her driving class, she saw him on the other way.. she waved her hand…Driving sir asked “who is that guy??”
Unknowingly She told,” my cousin, father’s brother’s son…..”
Amal came near, by seeing the driving sir he asked “Maya ,is this your Father !!!! ?? “
Driving sir stared at Maya….after amal left, sir asked
“your Cousin don’t know your Father !!!!! ?”


 Maya  was not able to  see anything  infront of her…she neither heard anything….she was in some other world…” what happened to me……….!!” She was surprised….a new feeling….her heart started beating in some other rhythm….. she loved to hear his name with her name….in her diary pages she simply wrote his name along with her name…. a sweet feel of fear to see him doesn’t  restrict  her to be far from him…she herself created situations to meet him….

Next day she went to his class and called him..she described previous days  incident.. that how her driving sir teased her infront of everyone…. He laughed as it is a joke…. Suddenly his class teacher came and called him…she left the class…. She was only able to see his face…magic in his eyes….his smile….poems in his words…..”hey what is happening for me…”she started trying to neglect thoughts about him….but…she lost herself somewhere….

The next day he came to her class….called her….he told ” my class teacher started teasing me by telling your name.it will  be a problem for us…so it will be  good to keep distance. ” whether someone threw a stone at my heart ??” she controlled her tears…and at this pain in heart made her understand that she is in love…..

Being in love and cannot express it is a beautiful irritation…….Maya intentionally went the places were he came, as if she was not aware…. But he was always keeping distance and which made her really depressed….on his farewell day she decided to meet him. she went near his class. He was talking with his friends.by seeing Maya  he came near and  told today is his final day in college. she asked for his contact number. he saved her number in his mobile and took her hand and wrote his number in her hand. she told him to call her daily …
he replied…” I am not calling my lover only daily..,then how can I call you…. !!!!!!!!!   and he smiled…. Maya was in a shock and she somehow stop herself from crying….and asked about his lover. he asked her to find out…directly she went to the church near by the college……….And cried aloud…..

He added her name in his friend list and started messaging her. she also replied for every message. Since Maya knows to write poems, Amal asked her to write romantic poems, so that he can send that to his lover. whatever she felt in her mind about him ,she sent him, knowing he will forward that to his lover. Amal considered her as his best friend and he  always want Maya to suggest the gifts ,which he need to gift his lover. Maya was totally confused.. what to do…by seeing her situation ,her friends asked her to stop contact. but  she was not able to do that  .. .within that time she was in a situation in which she can’t forget him… but being a best friend and hearing about his lover ‘s story made her in a depression. So she decided to disclose everything to him and to say a good bye….
At last, at the end of her patience, she thought of revealing everything. But he was shocked by hearing everything.
He consoled her by saying,
“it is all age problem. don’t get stuck to this and loss your studies” .and he added “since you can’t forget me when we are in contact. Let us keep distance.”
 she replied “don’t get worry of my situation. My Krishna will guide me… bye… “

It took a long time for her to get out of the depression. But she couldn’t forget him .whenever anyone ask about lover or marriage she missed him a lot. Whenever she saw lovers she remembered him…. She tried a lot to forget him…but each moment made her to think of him….

After four years……….from college life she stepped to professional life….everything changed. .her appearance…life style….friends….but one thing remained the same…. Her first Love….she missed him even more….but she was not having any idea regarding him…where he will be..?  what he will be  doing… ?

Her parents started searching guy for her… so she thought…till now lord Krishna has given an answer for whatever questions she asked….but why he made her to love him….she  thought of saying a final good bye to him….before forgetting him…

At last she sent him a friend request on April 25.He accepted it on April 26. he asked…,
“Still remember me?”
She replied,
“without remembering how I can sent friend request “
As usual, he sent a smiling smiley…he is always like that…that smile won’t go from his face…. And from his messages also….
She asked “  how are you …? what doing now? “
He replied, “ I am good… now working in Cochin ..and how are u  ?“
She Answered  “ I am fine…. And how is your girlfriend ?”
After a two minute of silence he replied,
“ she will be definitely happy.. because tomorrow is her marriage … !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! “
Maya was unable to type anything….
He asked again.. “shall I ask something..don’t feel bad..”
She replied,” no …tell me… “
He typed “ you know this before and now you came to tease me right ? otherwise how you pinged me on the correct day… after four years… ? “
Tears came from her eyes… again she is the culprit… why Krishna..!! Why you are always doing like this… ?
She replied “ No…. I did not know about this… I am swearing  in the name of Krishna.. “
He texted.. “  ya … I know , you can’t hurt anyone… and you can’t lie in the name of your Krishna… “
She felt relaxed…. Because in these four years of time.., she never tried to contact him only because of the reason it may hurt him…. She can’t even imagine teasing him….
He texted “ Maya .. Iam not in a good mood..  Catch u later bye … “
She read the chat again and again.. after long four years his name on her chat list…
But day by day from his chatting she understood ,he was in a depression because  he had involved a lot in his love…. Sometimes some words of him hurt her more and more…. But… yet she asked her parents not to search a guy for her now.. After two years of her course only she is ready to get marry…..
Maybe she is again ready to wait for him for two more years…. She hoped after recovering from his depression, he will start loving her………….

Love is a special feeling. The more and more you get hurt.. the more  and more you will urged to get love… ..like a fly coming near the fire knowing it will burn her  ….. !!!




Slowly a good tone of friendship again came to their relationship…daily they used to share everything happened on that day…
Maya was eagerly waiting for evening..so that he will come online and chat with her.sometimes her emotions will overflow and she struggled hardly to hide her love…
but love is like a fire..hiding love is like covering fire with a paper….fire can burn the paper…that happened in their love also…everything which she  hided for four years burst as tears one day ….

then he asked “Maya..are you sure that you will be happy with me for the entire life…. ?what you know about me…?still why you are loving me? many differences are there between us…above all once I broke your heart badly…. I don’t think I am deserving your unconditional love…and you remember once my class teacher teased me with your name?that time,I told him you are my best friend and Aiswarya is my lover..he smiled and told, either one of them will remain in your life the other will go …that is the reason that I avoided you from college….
Maya Replied” I don’t know to think many things…but I want to follow what my heart says…”
Again Amal told, “since you are small and not matured enough, you cant think many things about life..but there are many things…I am talking from my experience…but  one thing I can tell you…you are so special for me…but I cant make you cry anymore..so think well…there are many factors..your parents,brother…. no one should get disappointed because of this decision.I don’t want anyone to get disappointed because of me”
Amal gave her three months of time to think on this…so again for three more months they remained as best friends….
Maya thought, ” for Long four years, I was thinking on this..then what more I can think in three months…………!!!!!!!!!!!!!” ….”
And they remained as best friends..understanding each other..caring each other….

And finally that day came…for which they were waiting .But these three months were lengthier than those four years…. That night 12’ O Clock her phone rang….with great excitement she took the phone…in a low voice he asked, “What you decided finally?”
She replied, “I thought of the negative and positives of my decision… “
He asked, “Happy to hear that you are talking as a matured girl…then what is the conclusion?”
She Continued….
“since I am deciding about my life by my own. Much opposition may come…but if you are there to hold my hands in any difficulties…I will be there as your girl…. !!!“
Amal told,” I gave you three months not to test you…but to make you understand these many negatives are there in me…since you admired me from college days. You may not aware ofthat… when one is admiring the other only positives will be counted. But that is not life. In love negatives also should be loved, should be admired….Now I understood…you were correct….I only was not knowing what is love…I considered your love as immature. Boasting myself from that  blind world….Now I know…I am the luckiest guy in this world. God tested me this much to give you… For any reason I won’t leave you…Love you dear… !!! “
Maya closed her eyes tightly to hear those golden words….the whole world was silent for her that time ….only his words she heard…..!!!

May be God wrote this story with his own hand….by taking four years he beautified it maximum….Now Amal and Maya is dreaming about their future with the permission and blessing of their parents… J

Friday, October 10, 2014



Being in a magical feeling…..


I wonder till now how I wrote  poems about love without knowing the  feeling  .. !!!
I was in my dream world seeking   the answer for love.
But now you  came to my life to give me the answer,…and now I don’t know how  portrait  write this magical feeling .. !!!!
May be this mysterious feeling is  called love..!!!!!!!!!


A sweet fear of hiding this secret is holding me back from writing,
Because now whatever I write , whatever I paint, whichever song I sing  is not about love…,
It’s only about u…
Even without talking a word you stayed back yet….
Why you didn’t call me in your painful days…?


But you know one thing dear …these long years has proved me that
I can’t love anyone except u…
One red rose which you are given means me a lot than a garden of flowers…


Loving one is a special feeling of love…
But cant love anyone else even in your ignorance was a painful feeling of love…
And now I am enjoying the eternal feeling of those four  letters “LOVE” !!!

Once you   told me that you are a black paper and to stay apart…
But dear I don’t want to know your past…. And
I am sure that once you will start loving me…but promise me that
Only my poem should be there in that paper then ….
Because I love you so much….



Since you made me alone these many years, I will take a dark revenge,
Promise me that you will die only after my death…,
then only you will  know how badly I missed you ….
And more over, I can’t miss you anymore in my  life ….


Tuesday, March 11, 2014

colour of love........!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

You always put yourself in  silence…………!!
Why I didn’t realize the rhythm of your heart,
While walking close to you before……….??
You always irritated me by arguing for simple reasons……..!!

  Once I told , ”colour of love is red”
  U asked: ”can you tolerate red blood flowing from your beloved one?? ”
                I told , ”then blue is the colour of love”
  Again you told,” why blue sky is so far if his love towards earth is so strong??”
  You made me confused again…I told ”green is the colour of love”
  You argued again ”every butterfly seeks honey in flowers not in green leaves…”
   I got angry and I shouted  ,”white is the colour of love”
  You smiled and told ,”how can you trust moon’s love , its surrounded by many stars right.!!?? “
                This time I lost patience and I shouted,
   “why you are always arguing ,I know what is love better than you….”

     But dear…. Then I didn’t understand the meaning of your smile….!!!!!!!!!!!!
Now  you showed me the colour of love……………….,
The wonder of care….,the melody in  smile……..
Dear….,!!  Without you I am nothing now
First time in life I feel myself as special…..
Now I am feeling more colours which I didn’t see before…!!!!!!!!
colour in your eyes when you look at me as if you are not seeing.. !!
colour in your smile when you read my poems and simply asking,
about whom these poems are…knowing its all are about you only……!!!
 And now I understood……………..
”there is no  colour for love!”
Love makes every colour  more beautiful…!!!!!!!!!!!!!!.”

Monday, January 27, 2014

A new light................!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

     A new light….which made me to smile and dream….!!!
A new friend…a new companion. Who teach me to love…
I am not loving you for the reason what you are,
But for the reason what I am in your presence….!!
How all of my day dreams came true through you…??
How you took my soul in your eyes…?
Till now, I kept myself in a wall of reserve character…
Everyone knocked it…but you break it….
Now I understood why I was hiding myself…
I was waiting for you…
Now I can see new colours,
Which I didn’t seen before….!!!!
Now I can feel new weather,
Which I didn’t feel before….!!!!
Now I know why river is flowing to reach ocean,
even struggling all the obstacles….!!!!
Now I understood the reason for sky to cry as rain,
When rainbow vanishes….!!!!
Now I understood why flowers are awaking,
When dew drop kisses….!!!!
Now I understood why moon is alone….!!
It is not loneliness ,but solitude…waiting for someone special…..!!
Arrangements for convenience is not love…
Even the solitude for true love is special…,
Which words can’t express….!!!!.
And now I understood why sky is blue, rose is red…
And tears are colourless….!!
Yes…..!! Love is reflecting in everything as colours….,
Love is the essence in everything…and now I can feel the miracle…!!!
From where all my poems are getting a new rhythm…??
Ya…all of my poems are hiding something special….
May be this miraculous feeling is called Love…!!!
Now I came to know, Life is beautiful than dreams…,
For those who know to love…….!!!!!

Monday, December 16, 2013

which you never known....!!!

I was curious about you in all my dreams….
The thing which I always forget to tell you was nothing but love…
At last you came to say me “good bye”,
In the corridor of our college…
And you disclosed your sweet secret-
Which you hide from me till now…
It was about your sweet hearts glittering eyes…
But you didn’t see tears glittering in my eyes….
When I walked away with a fake smile by hiding my tears..
You were still dreaming about your lovers glittering eyes..
And now…I am changing myself as a poem about you…
Which you have never known….


Monday, November 18, 2013

                              നീ അറിയാതെ പോയത്


ഒരായിരം നിനവുകളിൽ നിന്നെ  ഞാൻ കൊതിച്ചിരുന്നു .
പറയാൻ മറന്നതെന്തോ അതു പ്രണയമായരുന്നോ ??
ഒടുവിൽ ഒരു യത്രമൊഴിയുമയ് നീയാ കലാലയത്തിൻ -
വാരാന്തയിൽ വന്നു നിന്നു ......
ഇതുവരേ പറയാത്ത രഹസ്യത്തിൻ ചാരുതയെന്നപോലെ ,
നീ നിൻ പ്രിയസഖി തൻ മിഴിത്തിളക്കം വർണിച്ച നേരം -
എന്നുടെ മിഴിനീരിൻ തിളക്കം നീ കണ്ടീല ...
പുഞ്ചിരിയിൽ വേദന ഒതുക്കി ഞാൻ നടന്നു ...
നീ സ്വപ്നം കാണുകയായിരുന്നു ....
നിന്നാത്മസഖിതൻ മിഴിത്തിളക്കം ....
ഇന്നിതാ നിന്നോർമയിൽ നിയറിയാതെ പോയ ,
ഒരു കവിതയായ് വീണ്ടും ഞാൻ മാറുന്നു .